Mirror Mirror on the Wall

Have you ever talk to yourself loudly? In the power of mirror mirror on the wall, I often to do that. When I have nothing to do, I'd loved to walk to the mirrors. My room isn't that big but I have mirror at every angle. Messy hair, sharp eyes, uncolored bitten-lips, my dearest freckles, and the line of the collarbone ; it's super-pretty-no make up-me. Mirror tells how gorgeous I am, especially when it comes to naked, haha sorry. Mirror boosts the confidence level, it also contains truth. 

Now, yes right now darling. Walk to the mirror, put the mask off, look at yourself and say "Hey. Thank you, for being you", then give a wink!! ;) It's awkward in the first time but then you'll find your smile everytime you repeat, I mean everythime you talk to yourself in front of the mirror. Either you get your confidence or at least you'll smile because of how silly you're :p OH!! Sometimes I do poses too. Yeah, you should do it often, it's relaxing.

I talk to myself about anything, we share everything. Mostly if I feel too over about something like burnout at work, overthink my overthinking, homesick, confused, even when I feel sick. "Hey, we can through this girl. You are amazing and I love you", I said. Of course I give her hug too. This thing is a part of my acceptance process, helps me be more rational and calmer. My temporary peace. I'm happy having this method. 

Okay it's getting bigger, greater, and expanded out of control recently. I can't lie and deny, I need to scream it out immediately. I talked to the mirror a couple times, it seemed sad and distracted. It just doesn't work as before, I'm afraid the mirror lost its power. I'm questioning my introvert side because I run too fast to many people. Look, I can't reach my mirror yet I need to get it out of my mind so that I talk to people I can trust a.k.a bestfriends. Receiving a lot of opinions and it consumes me more badly. Deep down, I'm pissed. Sleepless nights are hundred percent killing me, plus I'm powerless to external things. It's just the matter of time that I'll get my beloved gerd back, for sure. 

I, I'm just confused, blanked out.

Ain't in hurry, I'm learning and processing what's going on right now. You should know that I never do something serious in halfway, not a chance. It's understanable if we want to know each other more, yeah I totally get that we're trying. I'm happy for your presence, hope you feel the same way. I just wanna know what you stand for, where you exactly are, please clear it out. Not your feeling or what we are. I know you have a thing with someone else and if you want what we have works, please disccuss it first. I don't care the rest, just you. You can share everything with me, be honest to each other is better. Don't put me in between, ugh, it's harder than I thought. This way, I don't see us there. I just can't. I should shut your spark down, shouldn't I?